Cozy season, the pressures of raising good humans, & stocking stuffers!
Issue #5 - December 5, 2023
→ the pressure of growing a good human
YAAALLLL no one told me.
When we brought Delilah home from the hospital, I thought - OK the tough part is over (LOL). Just gotta keep this tiny human alive.
And for the next 12-15 months, that was my only goal.
make sure she doesn’t swallow dog food (or, too much at least)
make sure she doesn’t slip in the bath
make sure she is buckled into her carseat
make sure we watch her like a hawk when she eats grapes! tomatoes! anything small and round! (p.s. how is it we haven’t figured out how to genetically engineer grapes that are safe for babies when elon musk is literally engineering brain implants? feels like a scam but ok)
And at times that felt like all too much. It can be REALLY stressful.
But now that she’s at the wise age of 2, I have new concerns.
I am directly responsible for making sure she’s a good human being. That she grows to contribute to society, that she leaves the earth better than she finds it, that she is inclusive, confident, kind, and honest.
SIMPLE RIGHT?!
No one prepares you for the day when your main concern as a mom is one minute - grapes - and the next - the crushing pressures of raising a good human.
I don’t have it figured out. But here’s where I am starting:
Accept her overwhelming, all-consuming 2-year-old emotions. I can’t even control mine at 30 - and I have a fully developed prefrontal cortex (allegedly). In fact sis, let’s pitch a fit together. I’m due for one.
Accept that she will love cheerios one day and want to murder me the next for merely implying that she might like a lil cheerio snack. Toddlers have no logic or ration. My structured engineering brain will do it’s best to roll with the punches.
Accept her. The hitting when she’s tired, the giggles when we read llama llama, the excitement when I promise a trip to the zoo, the tears when the elephants are “visiting Africa today”. All of it is safe with me.
Wherever you are on this journey - I see you. Also, if you’ve figured out a foolproof way to raise a good human, let me know! I’d be really interested in buying whatever you’re selling 🤣
p.s. That is where I am starting - but I don’t always get it right. I’m often giving myself a time out when I am suffering from overwhelm + sensory overload. I am impatient too!!! & if you’ve ever met a two-year-old, you would know that their number one characteristic at this point is SLOW. So so slow.
→ I’m gonna be totally honest with yall.
I had a REALLY LONG STORY written to go in this space.
& my copy editor (aka brother) told me it was trash.
KIDDING. He’d never. But he did say it needed work 🤣 and I wholeheartedly agreed. So I am reusing a LinkedIn post from Saturday in this space instead. If you’ve read it already, move along! If not, enjoy.
SO here are 10 mindset shifts I was reminded of last week:
1. Saying YES when you really mean NO is a way of pleasing others while doing a disservice to yourself.
2. Toddlerhood is a state of being that is utterly free of logic & ration. Just because she likes cheerios today has no bearing on her interest in them tomorrow.
3. There are a million ways to "make it" in entrepreneurship & business, but that doesn't mean any of them are right for me (or you!).
4. Reminder that when you want a new tattoo... wait 6 months & if you still want it, get it. 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘴𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 😂
5. When someone tells you the truth & holds you accountable, it might not be what you want to hear, but it's probably what you need to hear.
6. What you see on the surface of a person is probably only 10% of who they are and what they've been through. Be nice to people.
7. Pinestraw is not a thing that exists in all areas of the world 😂 not convinced? check out the comments on this linkedin post of mine.
8. It's ok to ditch the formats, perfect posting times, & expectations. In fact - my only goal for December on LI & in this newsletter is to write and create and tell stories.
9. Language impacts your mindset. Why am I calling this a small business when one day it will be a company? From now on, I'm running a company.
10. My 2 year old is way more brave than I am. Ditching the fork & eating her mac n cheese by the fistful? Wish I could do that. Saying "BYE BYE" loudly to anyone she's not interested in? Iconic. Be like a 2 year old.
What mindset shifts have you been reminded of lately?
→ Links
my favorite things on the internet today:
An article for men! On how to help your company meet gender equality goals. Now you can’t ever say I don’t talk about men!
Spoiler alert to my husband’s family - but this is what yall are getting in your stockings. Who doesn’t want a clean car?
An article on Taylor Swift’s impact on the U.S. Economy.
My favorite new artist playlist: Noah Kahan 😍
See you next Tuesday. & as always,
I’m rooting for you.
xx Hannah